With six kids it can be kind of hard to get out on dates with my husband.
It’s expensive to hire a babysitter and also hard to find one that I think can actually handle all six of my offspring.
There are days when I feel like I barely survive caring for them!
I know there is the typical watch-a-movie-together-when-the-kids-are-finally-in-bed date, but I want to offer a few alternatives.
After all, your parents told you as a teenager that movies are the worst kind of dates for a reason. You don’t even actually get to talk to your date or get to know them better.
Yeah, think about that one. You don’t get to talk to your date and get to know them better.
I like movies with my husband too, but we try to limit the TV in our house and we’ve found some great alternatives where we actually get to talk to each other.
Date idea #1
My husband and I were sitting down to dinner a while ago after calling the kids to the table.
The kids’ selective hearing kicked in and my husband and I remained alone at the table. Minutes slipped past. In exasperation, my husband suggested we start without them.
Normally this is a no-no. I have it so ingrained in my head that every dinner meal must be all of us together if at all possible. And we do a pretty good job of it too!
But that night we didn’t feel like waiting any longer.
It. Was. Amazing.
Here’s what happened:
- We didn’t need to talk over other conversations.
- We could make eye contact unimpeded.
- Kids never interrupted us with tangential comments or whining about siblings’ actions.
- And best of all, no one told us how terrible the home-cooked meal tasted.
I’ve got good kids, but there are those days though!
My husband said, “Hey! This is like a date!”
I agreed wholeheartedly.
It was crazy how fun it was to have a conversation about whatever and enjoy each other’s company.
Just. Us. Two.
Now before I go any further, I want you to know that I DO absolutely believe that families should have meals together, especially supper. Please make a special effort to do so.
Mealtime is a great time for everyone to discuss their day and share their ideas, feelings, and thoughts.
What I am saying is that when you get out together as little as my husband and I seem to, then this is a fun, simple way to have a little together time every now and then.
We don’t even really plan it out.
Usually it happens if the kids were watching a show while I cooked dinner and it wasn’t quite done when the food was ready. Or the kids are enmeshed in building Lego houses together after school. Or chaos will reign if they can’t find out who wins the game they’re in the middle of playing.
So nothing fancy, just some good old-fashioned one-on-one time.
Date idea #2
Put those cute kids to bed a little early, get out the fun snacks, and dust off the games!
My husband and I used to do this a lot before all the kids came along, but every now and then we’ll pull out a favorite game or two after all the little ones are sleeping and have a game night.
I’m actually getting excited just writing about it!
You may want to plan this one out.
Write it on your calendar and make sure everything is lined up for a smooth, quick, bedtime routine for the kids. Plan ahead for some tasty snacks or treats that maybe you don’t normally have.
The fun thing about games is that you can laugh, talk, tease, flirt and even compete if you want to.
Do you know how many times I “lose” games against my kids? It’s kind of funny and I need to get a little sneakier about it. They’re starting to catch on.
“Mom! You let her win!”
Don’t have to do that with my husband. I can trounce him. (He says he lets me. Riiight.)
But you may want to be selective about which games you play.
Have you ever played Othello? That game is not good for my marriage! Seriously.
I end up so mad at my husband because he wins every time! Argh!
He remembers playing it with his grandfather and loves it (even though he could never beat his grandpa).
Luckily my son is pretty good at it and he’ll play it with my husband.
Currently, our favorite game to play together is Splendor and its expansion set. We play these a lot with our kids as well, but they work really well as a two-player husband-wife game too.
A few of our other favorites have been: Scrabble, Blokus, Labyrinth, and Rumis.
Rumis is really fun, especially since I usually win! It’s like a 3-D Tetris. Unfortunately, it looks like it may have been discontinued because it’s really expensive now. I’ll need to guard mine more carefully!
Date idea #3
Since some of our kids are old enough to watch their younger siblings for short periods of time, sometimes we’ll leave a phone with the kids and take a short walk somewhere in the neighborhood.
That only works if you have responsible older children.
I feel very blessed that I have one in particular that I can really count on!
What Do You Do?
Now it’s your turn to share.
If you have a great idea for an at-home date, please put it in the comments! I’m always on the lookout for something new.
As Valentine’s Day approaches, I hope you’ll have an awesome date with your Valentine.
But if you can’t get out, I encourage you to find a way to still make your day awesome and full of love! (And maybe a mini-date.)